A relationship without intimacy can quickly devolve. Your thought may leap towards physical affection when you think about intimacy in a relationship. But building up emotional intimacy is equally essential, beyond any doubt.
Intimacy develops within a relationship, so when couples lack emotional intimacy, empathizing, and developing trust may prove to be challenging. Emotional intimacy means being emotionally in tune with your partner.
In a relationship without intimacy, it may be challenging to build a strong bond and form trust. Intimacy is characterized as an intimate, familiar, and special relationship that exists physically and emotionally between humans.
A healthy relationship exists in all forms of trust that have developed and matured over time. That survives on a steady release of self-reflection and intimacy. All humans crave love and affection as a basic necessity, both in spoken word and in physical affection.
A relationship without intimacy can create issues for couples, especially if one partner is more affectionate than the other. Intimacy provides solid pillars for partners to endure through difficult times together. It not only serves as an anchor but also offers constant reassurance that you are not alone. Listed below are 8 signs that you are in a relationship without intimacy.
Feeling Distant
Without emotional intimacy, a relationship can quickly deteriorate. The lack of intimacy can lead to growing distant, as though the real emotions of your partner make you uncertain. This why relationship without intimacy can usually be very stressful and short-lived.
Without being able to pinpoint the reason, you can feel the distance grow. This is a sign you are in a relationship without intimacy because you can’t even communicate the problem.
Sometimes this distant in a relationship signifies a loss of emotional intimacy. Leaving the desire to cultivate an emotional bond that fuels interaction between you and your partner. In a relationship without intimacy, there is no comfort of knowing whether your partner is there for you or not.
Or if they truly support and love you. The feeling of being distant from your partner grows when you find them not beside you in times of need. When you are together, you may feel disconnected without ever finding an explanation for it. You can try to openly address how you feel with your partner and see how he/she reacts.
Inability To Express Emotions
A lack of openness is another indication that you don’t have a firm foundation of emotional intimacy in your relationship. It is important to talk about your emotions and thoughts with each other. Such things are difficult to think about since they require us to practice being transparent with one another.
When couples are unable to express emotions and their thoughts, they come out in all sort of problematic forms. The lack of ‘real talk’ can lead to a habit of fighting about small things, or evading each other.
Lack of trust and inability to express your feelings can cause relationship problems. Or being afraid that your partner may invalidate your feelings if you try talking about your feelings. That alone is a sign that you are in a relationship without intimacy.
Talking about anything but your emotions can be problematic. It is often easier to feel dissociated from your partner when they don’t validate your feelings. It is pertinent to address the elephant in the room with your partner, no matter what. These things can be resolved by starting to open again, and sharing your problems and seeing how your partner responds.
Keeping Secrets
Another sign you are in a relationship without intimacy is when one person shares more than the other. This is a result of a lack of emotional intimacy. It might just appear like your partner’s a good listen, but that isn’t the case. It is often a sign of imbalance.
This can also be an indication that your partner may not feel comfortable sharing his emotions in the relationship. It can also imply that a partner may not leave room for their significant other to feel comfortable sharing secrets.
Your emotional intimacy with your partner can quickly fade away once you both start feeling misunderstood. Doing small talk can quickly become redundant when your partner stonewalls you every time you talk about issues.
In a relationship without intimacy, people tend to keep secrets from each other. Keeping secrets in a relationship leads to growing distance between you and your partner. When you keep secrets from each other, you basically have a wall separating the two of you.
It is not necessary to share every tiny detail of your life with your partner. But keeping big secrets can quickly break a stable relationship. It will result in barriers that will be hard to break down once they take their place. So if you feel like this is happening in your relationship, then it is always better to bring it up.
Not Sharing Your Life
Apart from the growing distance because of keeping secrets, not sharing aspects of your life can also complicate things. When you start avoiding them in a physical sense as well, it showcases that you’re in a relationship without intimacy.
It could be not talking, not going on dates like you used to, or not sharing life experience. It can significantly drive a wedge between you and your partner. Your emotional intimacy can quickly go away when either of you don’t feel understood. It is not always about communicating your problems, it is equally essential to comprehend the problems.
When you don’t have an emotional connection with your partner, it can result in less real talk. If you start noticing the effort that was there before you met your partner. Then it is a sign you are in a relationship without intimacy.
It is only normal to want to share aspects of your life with your partner. If your partner doesn’t radiate the same energy back, then it can be a sign of concern. If you start to feel uncomfortable being open with your partner, then it highlights the emotional distance between you two.
No Physical Affection
Lack of physical affection in a relationship without intimacy can also drive a wedge between couples. It is an apparent sign that you are in a relationship without intimacy if there’s no physical affection. For instance, when you are together, and you don’t hold hands, sit close, the little ways to express affection.
The lack of these little things is an example of no physical and emotional intimacy. Physical affection requires a close degree of emotional closeness as well. If you can feel a growing physical distance between you and your partner, then don’t let the feeling subside.
Emotional intimacy goes hand in hand with physical affection. If there is a lack of one, it can become problematic. Being emotionally in tune with your partner leaves a sense of calm and security. If that goes missing, then your relationship can easily deteriorate.
When you feel connected, it’s hard to not get intimate and physical with them. It also depends on the fact if your partner is receptive to your affection or not. Such things can significantly impact your relationship gravely.
In the end, it is pivotal to keep both emotional and physical intimacy alive in a relationship. The lack of either can result in complications and an unstable relationship.
Not Sharing Hobbies
One more aspect of having a healthy, stable relationship is sharing your hobbies, interests with your partner. Finding yourself unable to do so, then it is a sign you are in a relationship without an emotional connection. Things are always significantly different before you jump into the relationship.
To make a relationship work, the effort should remain the same as it was before you were together. When partners stop doing stuff together –like going out, cooking together, then the intimacy between them fades away.
For example, some partners love watching TV shows together, and most times they end up watching something they don’t like. That’s only because they prefer spending quality time with their partner.
So, when the couples stop noticing the needs of their partner, then the intimacy runs out from the relationship. Not having to do the things you love doing with your partner can quickly dissipate your own energy as well? It is important that the effort to make things work goes both ways?
You can try rebuilding the same interests that brought you two together. This can help alleviate the existing tension between the two of you. If you feel the relationship is depleting despite being vocal about the issues, then it is a cause for concern.
Not Paying Attention
The most integral aspect of having an emotional connection is being able to listen and pay attention to your partner. Even if you communicate your thoughts and emotions, it is redundant if your partner doesn’t listen.
It is one of the most prominent signs in a relationship that can’t go amiss. It can be seen when your partner doesn’t listen to you. When the emotional connection between the two of you fades away, your partner will pay no attention. For instance, if one person is discussing issues that concern both of them, the other will tune out.
It can be seen during conversation, and in real life, such as missing birthdays or anniversaries. Especially when either of you fail to apologize after doing something wrong. Lack of accountability can significantly impact a relationship.
It is not impossible to fix this. Through listening attentively, being honest and open can develop an emotional connection. By being compassionate, empathetic, and a friend to your partner, you can change things. It is pertinent to address the issues and actively listen to your partner and communicate your love for them. If there is a continual lack of this, then it is a sign you are in a relationship without intimacy.
Not Asking For Advice
Supporting each other through good and bad times is pivotal. It can be challenging to do so when neither of you are there for each other. Every individual has the freedom to live as they want to. But going to your partner for advice or help shouldn’t be a problem.
It is an indicator of the lack of emotional connection between you two if you can’t be present. This could also mean you don’t respect your partner’s opinion enough to listen to them. If you’re not in the place where you can safely go to your partner for help, then it’s problematic. Maturity is always assessing whether the problem is coming from your end or theirs.
Having an emotional connection is pivotal for a healthy, stable relationship. If your relationship lacks one then it will cause serious problems. With no emotional connection, it can leave space for no trust, transparency in the relationship.
It is not impossible to fix things with your partner. With a bit of effort, couples can easily find and work out the problems bothering them. Every issue is resolved by communication and comprehension. One can’t exist without the other. Apart from indulging in verbal communication, it is equally important to indulge in non-verbal affection. This way, it will bring you two together instead of apart.
Conclusion
A relationship cannot survive without intimacy. Having a relationship without intimacy will only leave space for growing distance, doubt, uncertainty, and insecurities. And without trust and connection with your partner, a relationship can deteriorate.
When intimacy is lost in a relationship, it can be brought back. It takes a lot of effort and commitment to place time in someone. If it isn’t reciprocated, then the absence of a sign is a sign itself. Every human crave both physical and emotional intimacy with their partner.
If your partner doesn’t validate your feelings, it is better to not force things. Intimacy isn’t just having a physical connection. The most important thing about a healthy relationship is communication, comprehension, and trust.
When two people want to make things work, they learn to swallow their pride. If you find yourself stuck in a blame game, and gas lighter behaviour, then it is better to leave.
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Reference
Jeremy Park, the founder of jeremylife.com, is a love and relationships expert. With a journalism degree and years of exploration, he offers valuable insights to help you live your best love life. His mission is to make the journey enjoyable and effortless.
